their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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