I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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