That's intense
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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