You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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