Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Randomize
