Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Randomize
