i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
