i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize