I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize