who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
