Well douche your snatch and let's go!
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize