Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
