I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Randomize
