do herpes really smell.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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