Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.