it's like iHOP with fire
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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