i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
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