I'm gonna have a badass scar
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Randomize
