That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
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Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
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I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help