I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
