Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize