Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Another day, another engagement, another cat
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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