Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
you win again, gameday.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Randomize