DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
