oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
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