Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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