You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
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