So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Randomize
