I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
