Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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