I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
10 Things Your Gyno Wants You To Stop Doing To Your Vagina
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
For Some Reason, Boys Are Singing The ‘Halo’ Theme Song In School Bathrooms
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.