dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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