Just cropdusted the office
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
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His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
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I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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