She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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