i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
