i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
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