I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
