first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize
