Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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