TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Randomize