words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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