Bisexual people are plain selfish.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
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