she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Randomize
