so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
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