ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
