is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize