About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
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