That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize