So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
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so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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