why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
