is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
