I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.